You'll Discover That Casual Friends Kept Notes in Their Pockets to Remember Your Name

I've made the official decision to go down and attend school at Purdue next year. I have to say that I am thoroughly looking forward to getting out of this town and experiencing college life for real. Not this, drive 20 minutes to a wipe ass excuse of a campus. I'm also looking at what the hell I'm going to change my major to when I get down there. I thought about it long and hard and what can I really do with an enlgish major?? I can become a teacher or work for the government. I wouldn't mind being a teacher, but I just would like to have a job where I make more of an income than that of a teacher. As far as the government goes...what the hell could I do for them that they can't do for themselves?? I guess I could become a write, but I'm not going to shit myself. I'm not, nor will I ever be, good enough to be an author.

So, that leaves me with basically becoming what I was last year. I will most likely go down there and enroll into the ol' engineering program again. Either that or I will just go the simply route and just settle with being an electrician. Or something along the lines of that. Not only will it be better income in the long run, but it will finally shut my dad the fuck up about me doing something with my life. Christ knows I'm sick of that shit.

I hung out with Becca tonight. We talked about life and love and everything in between. Which I found really interesting because, no offense to her, she just doesn't semm like the kind of person I could do that with. It was interesting to say the least. Shes really the only person have seen since Friday. She made mention how Chelsea came into Target with one of her friends the other night. Becca told her I was working and she should go visit. It would've been a nice visit, if she did that is. I tried calling her, but shes blowing me off again. I can't say that I'm surprised. I don't know if its another attempt on her part to finally just push me out of her life or what the fuck. And I'm beginning to think...maybe I should finally just give up. Everyone else seems to have, why am I sticking around?? I'll tell you why, because we've seen too much shit and been through too much together for me to just be like "Ok, we don't hang out anymore, thats cool." I don't work that way. Its just another one of those times where I sit here and question...what the fuck?? Plus I just find it funny how the 'peppy' fake choir people she used to say that she hated so much, is pretty much what she has become. Not thats shes become it, its just all she knows/ hangs out with. She says she has changed, but has she really?? Is she really a different person, or just different for them?? I don't know. I've tried to make some sort of contact. All I'm saying is, now don't wonder why you don't hear from one of your closest friends for a month. Its a two way street.

I think thats a sufficient amount of bitching and sharing insight for the morning. Hope everything goes well. See you sometime in the future. If I don't...you'll see me in the past. Either way, I'll see you, you see me, we'll see something. Sometimes the greatest journey is the distance between two people.