The Boy Who Always Smiles, Although His Heart Gets Broken

Hello friends and...more friends. In case anyone had noticed, I have kind of been in a bummed out mood lately. Yesterday Theresa called it quits with us. I took it hard and thought it was tough, I really didn't know why and it was really buggin me. I checked her Xanga.:SIDE NOTE:. I believe that Xanga sucks evil monkey gonads, thats why I use Blogger .:END SIDE NOTE:. I read through it all and she understands that I was miserable. Then I read the end and she says "I will update later and let you know if I saw that boy because PS he called again last night and I decided I deserve to have fun so I am going to try to see him tomarrow PSS his name is Eli and he has sexy long hair yes I like long hair." Guess I wasn't fun enough, since she deserves some. Can't compete with sexy long hair, too much for me. I know thats not what she meant, shes just stressed out about a lot. She just wants to have fun, get her mind off of things. I mean I'm here for her to help through stuff, but I guess that doesn't matter. I do have to say that it feels like shit to know that there is some other guy. When she told me yesterday, I just kind of spaced out from shock i guess. I gave her a hug goodbye but didn't look at her face. I lost it when I was leaving. I didn't want to go home crying and I had no where else to go, so I just drove. Drove for hours to where I don't even know, I didn't care. I can't sit and think without thinking about her, and crying. So, yea, I thought we had something going something nice. I should've learned by now that it always turns out for the worst when I start feeling the best. I think she was also worried about me going away to college, I decided that I am going to go to Southwestern Michigan though for that apprenticeship deal. This means that I will live at home, I didn't want to tell Theresa that though. I didn't want to make her feel that she was holding me back. I care about her a lot though, I don't know what I did/didn't do. I can't control her feelings, if she doesn't like me then I can't make her. I just wish once it would work out for the best. But, I've gotten through it before...nothing new. Hence the title.

Enough about that, yesterday was Nacho's birthday. I felt kind of bad that I haven't gotten him anything yet. I mean him and Ryan got me some random crap and I haven't repaid the favor. I think I might get him some gift cards to Low Bob's, he would appreciate that. It was a grand ol' time over at The Dill Residence. It was just everyone hangin out, Ian, Scotty, Ryan, Dan, Katie, Ben, Meagan, Danny, and Omar. Hannah and Kara showed up when I was going home. Patterson said he was going to show, don't think he ever did. Thats not surprising though. Ian went ahead and bought a pretty nice hookah bong for his B-Day. I have to say it reminded me of a faberge egg. It was very interesting, everyone smoking and passing around in a circles. Even Ian's parents were doing it, and encouraging Carrie to. It made for one hell of a good time. After that we all jumped in the pool for some good party times. Once again, the amount of chest hair I have never seizes to amaze the crowd. I stand by the statement that I am indeed "a freaking bear."

I went and gave blood today at the Harris Library. Its always fun giving blood, I've only done it twice but its well worth it. They actually got blood out of my arm this time, they didn't have to stick me twice like the people at Penn had to. It was also good because I got to have some reading material wilst getting blood drawn. I figured I didn't have enough time to read an actually book, so I just grabbed the Rolling Stone and went to town. I just happened to notice that they gave the new White Stripes album, Get Behind Me Satan, 4 1/2 stars. I have had my doubts about the White Stripes, but I do have to say that Jack White knows what hes doing. I was opened up to the latest Loretta Lynn album via Dan. That had something to do with Jack White, and I think that the album is gold. I'll have to check it out though, see if its 4 1/2 star material.

I shaved my beard yesterday. I wanted to get one of those cool looking Civil War beards that grow from the sideburns into the 'stache. So, I got home from Ian's house and that was the first thing I did. I didn't want to completely do that though, I wanted to do something that I have never seen. I figured I would do the Civil War beard, and have a sole patch, It turned out pretty sick. I have an obsession with facial hair and making it look unique, can that be considered art?

I'll end on saying that The 'I' in Team has a show at Sufficient Grounds on Friday and all who read this should go. It is going to be the best thing happening to you on Friday. For those who don't know, The 'I' in Team is Johnny C and Dan. I have never missed one of Dan's shows and I don't plan on this being the first. Be there or be square. See you in the funny papers.